By Caroline Williams, Guest Contributor
Growing up I used to say that I wanted to have three kids and that two of them would be twins. I thought it would actually be a possibility, because my grandmother had twins. So the gene is there, right? It’s funny how things happen when you try to live your life according to this master “perfect” plan. My hopes when planning for my family would be that my kids would be at least 4 years apart. That was the plan.
Well….God has a sense of humor, man.
I had my son in 2013 and was enjoying every minute of being a new “mom” versus Caroline, the stepmother. To make sure my “plan” would go as planned, I got the Mirena. Humph, well fast forward 8 months and the little IUD came out. My doctor told me to wait until after my next cycle and he would insert another, but BE CAREFUL because you could get pregnant. My words “Oh, don’t worry!! He’s not touching me!” Five days later, Thanksgiving week, Tuesday to be exact, I became pregnant!
I was about to basically get my twins! Irish Twins if you want to be cute.
On August 22, 2014 I had my daughter and the same day I sealed the deal with a tubal ligation. “Why would you do that,” you might say? Well, after two second trimester miscarriages and having to have a cerclage done after each pregnancy, I was done with the journey of being pregnant. I had my set! Little did I know the journey that came with having two under two.
Remember when you were single and you could keep your house clean for weeks? Remember when you were single and you could go to the grocery store and buy groceries that would last for two weeks, at least? Remember when you got married and you could just up and go anywhere and do anything? It gets tricky with addition of two kids on top of the two you already had.
Now, I have a daily routine which consists of my alarm clock going off at 4:00, 4:15, and 4:30am. Yes, it takes that many alarms for me to understand that I need to get up and get ready. Then I finally get out of my bed at 5:15 :). I get myself dressed (little to no makeup some days), and then go and grab one child. I wrestle with him (the boy is easier) and get his clothes on and put him at the sink to brush his teeth. Next, I grab the other, who will put all of her dead weight on me and offer no assistance. I get her dressed and if needed do her hair, then to the sink she goes to brush her teeth. Once everyone is dressed it is now 6:00. We go downstairs where I make my coffee, lunches, pour allergy medicine into cups, and issue vitamins. I am also fussing about grabbing and putting on shoes. Get your breakfast and eat it! Get your homework and your backpacks so we can go! It’s now 6:25 and we are walking out the door to head to work/school (thank God my kids go to the school where I work, which makes the commute easier).
School and work is now over and I’m picking up from daycare and YMCA and heading home in afternoon traffic. My commute is 30-45 minutes and, depending on the day, we may have to stop at dance class or swimming. Once we are at home, it’s homework, sight words, eating dinner, and a little free time. Bedtime occurs at 8:15-8:30pm. Twins sleep and Mommy is tired.
What do you do once they are in bed? Glad you asked, I sit on my couch and guiltlessly watch Reality TV. It is calming and relaxing for me and no one is talking to me. My husband is in bed, because he has to be at work by 3:00/4:00 am. [Side note: Hubby will pitch in help in the afternoon with cooking and putting in bed at least 2-3 times in a 5-day work week. It does help with an extra hand, plus he doesn’t want to see a frustrated mommy/wife who can easily transfer her feelings to him:).] So yea, I’m exhausted and just want some peace and quiet. Once I’m in bed (9:30/10:00), I’m out like a light and wake up to repeat.
PHEW!!! Typing that is tiring; however, I can honestly say that I love being a mom with all the headaches, hustle and bustle. Cleaning happens when it can and I stopped worrying about being that “All-American” mother. As long as my kids are happy, clothed, and fed, then I have done my job. The rest I leave to my newly purchased iRobot to take care of…lol!!!
Overall, I just want those mothers out there who are juggling with littles and puberty stricken teenagers, to know that it’s okay if your house isn’t perfectly clean or you find yourself pointing your finger fussing at everyone and everything. It just means you are momming your butt off!!! Try to do something for yourself every now and again and have “mommy time”. It helps to keep you sane and going on the mommy train. I cannot wait to see how all of my hard work pans out once these kids are adults.
Caroline is a mother of four residing in Houston, TX. She is a bonus mom to two handsome teenagers and mommy to her “Irish Twins” ages five and four. Caroline hopes that her story can help and inspire mothers who have experienced miscarriages or who are discouraged about having children. After having two second trimester miscarriages back-to-back (one boy, one girl) Caroline gave birth to her Irish Twins. To learn more about here story visit her blog.